yes yes

-

i haven't written about dreams for a little wihle mostly because i haven't been able to remember them, or they just haven't been happening.

i think it's because

i ask for them? i have it in my heart to find some kind of answer in them, that they'll give me some kind of clue or something..they can sense that, so they're hiding

but last week, thursdya and friday mornings

first, a flash of..somebody driving, it didn't feel like me (jessica) but it was me(umm) behind the eyes..something

and an invisible passenger saying turn your high beams on, high beams, high beams, Quick! and this wasn't dirving on a roa

this was driving off a cliff, mid air, turning a corner

going aound clouds

and then the next one something about standing in the kitchen and dad and janet tlaking to me while i'm wiping up my 'favourite cup' (brown) and

i don't know, i was so fed up with whatever they were talking about, and so badly needing to express that i wasn't ok so i throw the cup on the ground. and when it didn't break i just kept on picking it up and throwing it down, eventually the handle broke off and then i was sad because now i still had my favourite mug but it had no handle..i don't know

neither of them felt like dreams but real happenings, and they both came back to me an hour or so after waking

i'd remember it and think..well when did that happen

dreams..i imagine, the mug is fine and..well no driving

did i mention i'm listening to bach?

and that i have this place to myself today, this

farm

and it's sunny outside and green and

just nice.

i played with my mums keyboard synthesiser thing before

theres some sounds to get lost in, it was fantastic

i'm expecting my granparents and i put a roast in the oven

-

the couch matches the material on the dining table chairs

and the banner up top says useless as tits on a boar and the 't' in the text they've used looks

i don't know, uncomfortable

-

i have such an overabundance of images now

-

what time do i want to leave brisbane and fly to sydney i wonder...9am?

it's $20 cheaper from 2pm...

apparantly i should go on the 13th instead of waiting another week.

i'm already rostered on at work though for that week so i...should wait

for that reason

-

hmm

i'm so very detatched from this

-

bach is just really nice

kind of friendly and inviting

-

i have an appointment early tomorrow morning. i think i'll stay up really late tonight.

-

fifty-six percent humidity. twenty four degrees.

about two weeks ago

according to these amazing scales at work that require you to know your height i was two kilograms away from being considered 'underweight'

with boots on

i think it's funny the way peoples bodies all seem to have thier own distinct shape..just funny

stopping rambling, i'm going to go read and eat chocolate.

!

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